Neko Makai' s Insanity
by Neko Makai
Summary: A crazy cat demon named Neko Makai and her friends plot to kidnap the Reikai Tantei. Includes alot of randomness and humor. Don't expect too much beyond that. Includes a few references to other anime.
1. The Plan

Disclaimer: Neko Makai does not own Anything from Yu Yu Hakusho, nor does she own Inuyasha or her best friends ,Kagome, Tikal and Sireah.She does, however, own herself. So, without further delay, Makai's Insanity.

-------------------------------------------------------

A short girl with orange tabby cat ears and a tail sits in a padded room in one of her special white jackets; extra snug. She rocks back and forth mumbling something about the possessed cheese graters and some bishounen named Kurama.

"Neko! Neko!" A fox girl unlocks the door and pops her head in. "Neko-chan!"

The tabby cat girl, Neko, looks up. "Sireah-chan!" She manages to stand up, still in her straightjacket. "I knew someday someone would break me out here! Otherwise the mother ship would have begun to send out the ducks with the cheese graters of doom!" (No ,that wasn't supposed to make any sense to a sane person. )

"I know Neko-chan! Kagome-kun told me to break you out so we could work on her new plan!"

"Plan?"

"To capture the Reikai Tantei of course! And after that, the Inuyasha characters as well!"

"KURAMA!"

"I know!"

Both Neko and Sireah do mental happy dances at the thought of kidnapping Kurama. They both leave the room, Neko still in a straitjacket ,to go see Kagome and her sister Tikal.

(Scene Change)

Sireah and Neko run/hop to Kagome's lair. Kagome cracks open the door and they slip in.

"Sireah-kun! Neko-kun!"

"Tikal-kun! Kagome-kun!"

"Tikal-kun! Kagome-kun!"

"Neko-chan! Sireah-chan!"

Neko and Sireah sit and stare at Kagome.

"What did you summon us for?" Sireah questions, cocking her head.

"Hai! Nani?" Neko questions as well.

"Well…" Kagome said, pulling out a pointing stick as a chalk board appeared from nowhere behind her. "…The plan is-" Kagome whispers it into Neko' s, Sireah,' s and Tikal' s ears in turn.

"Ooooooooooh. The geckos of the orange forest would be most agitated."

Tikal spoke for the second time. "Would it work?"

"Couldn't we just kill someone and have them arrest us?" Sireah said.

"Yeah, but this plan is much harder. So we have to use it for the sake of the plot." countered Kagome. While the foursome were pondering how they would do this, Kagome pointed to the parts of the chalk board with her stick. Neko listened quietly while rocking back and forth in her straightjacket. A knock on the door disrupted them for a moment.

"Who dares disturb Neko Makai? OH DEAR INARI! IT MUST BE THE CHEESE GRATERS! THEY'VE COME FOR ME! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- "pant pant breath "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Everyone stares at Neko for a minute before Sireah get up to answer the door.

TBC

Wheeeeee,nya! A cliff hanger!

Next chapter up soon.

Translation notes (as used in the story)

-chan = suffix meaning "girl" or "little" you may also see it used as it's other meaning, "my dear"

-kun = Well known friend. Mostly used among boys, but my friends and I are weird. o0;

Hai Nani = Yes! What?


	2. The Lucky Slorg

[Before I get started…. I'm so happy! I got TWO whole reviews! That's more than I ever expected! Oh yeah, and there was some weird glitch where chapter two was a repeat of chapter one. I honestly don't know what happened, but whatever it was, it should be gone now. To my two reviewers, YoukoRaven and Lumina Kitsune…THANK YOU SO MUCH! I never thought anyone would be bored enough to read this. And for a last disclaimer:

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Here's a disclaimer so you can not sue:

Things I do not own: Yu Yu Hakusho, my friends (Sireah, Kagome, Tikal and Lucky Slorg), slorgs, and Ron Weasley.

Things I do own: Me (Neko Makai), the Happy Acres Mental Institute, this story, and this snug white jacket I'm wearing that ALMOST prevents me from typing.- Okee, enough of me, enjoy.]

Sireah pushed the door open to reveal a girl about Neko's height with brown hair and freckles. Seeing her, Neko ran over to her, still in a straightjacket. "LUCKY SLORG!" She beamed and attempted to hug her and failed. Sireah smiled and waved, as did Tikal and Kagome. Neko walked back in and sat down, Lucky Slorg and Sireah following her.

"By the way," Neko looked at Lucky Slorg, "Did you hear about our plan?"

"No, what plan?"

"We're gonna kidnap the Reikai Tantei."

"Huh?"

"Kurama, Hiei, Yusuke, Kuwabara."

"The Yu Yu Hockey stick characters?"

"Yeah!"

"Cool! What's the plan?" Neko could tell Lucky Slorg wasn't as enthused as she was,so she added a last comment. "Later you and I can use the same plan to catch Ron Weasley."

"Ron?!" Lucky Slorg's eyes lit up.

"Yup!"

"Well, let's go! C'mon, tell me! What's the plan?"

Kagome's pointing stick continued to move across the chalk board, demonstrating the plan and attack formation. This went on for about and hour, very clearly demonstrated.

"It's brilliant!" Tikal exclaimed.

"It's perfect!" Sireah said happily.

"Wow, Kagome! That's really well thought out!" Lucky Slorg added.

"Just one question."

All eyes fell on Neko as everyone said in unison : "What?"

"Could someone undo my straight jacket? It's really tight and hard to move in."

Everyone face faulted.

TBC

Don't worry, it'll get funny soon!


	3. Neko's Recollections

Chapter 3

[To all my readers: I LOVE YOU! Thanks so much! Oh, and to Lucky Slorg -I wrote this for you, why aren't you reading this? READ! To Dad, who isn't going to read this, but I felt like writing this anyway: KURAMA'S NOT A GIRL! Okay, not that that's off my chest, let's go. The disclaimer is in the previous chapter. (And it rhymes, too!)]

After undoing Neko 's straightjacket, Sireah, Lucky Slorg, Kagome, and Tikal set off to put their plan into action. Neko was flailing her arms around, purely because she hadn't been able to for a while. The men in the white suits had taken her and thrown her in a soft pillow-ish room, and the nice doctor lady had given up all hope for her, Neko had guessed, because during her last session, she had burst into tears, leaving Neko with only the voices to talk to. Neko thought to herself as, for the millionth (according to Tikal) time, she hit Tikky hard in the nose with a flailing arm. With little notice, Neko went back to her thoughts.

She recalled the first time she'd met the voices, and had been carried away by the nice men, who had given her her very own white jacket. It was a bit too small, Neko thought, because it was really tight, but it's the thought that counts, ne? She had been set in a room, with soft, squashy pads, and every so often, she was allowed out to see a doctor. She vaguely remembered something the doctor lady (whose name she couldn't seem to remember clearly; the cheese graters must have had something to do with that.) had said about being "Overly obsessed with this 'Kurama' person" and "schizophrenic" but she stored the thought away as Lucky Slorg interrupted.

"Hey, Neko."

"Hmm?"

"We're here."

Neko looked up. Above her, she could see what any normal human would expect to see. Clouds and sky.

"Sireah thinks this is about where Reikai is, if you go up high enough," Kagome supplied.

"Oh, I see," Lucky Slorg said.

"Question. How do we get up there?" Neko asked.

Kagome looked over at her. "Oh, you'll see."

TBC


	4. Pulling the Rope

"Neko," Kagome looked at her, "You can fly in your 'Fushigi Seishin' form, ne?"

"Hai. But wouldn't it be easier for me to teleport us?"

"Yeah, but that's to simple. The story line requires us to do long, difficult things. It adds to the already cheap plot line."

"Oh."

"Kagome!" Sireah sighed. "You blew the fourth wall again! The authoress doesn't like it when we do that!"

"The authoress is right here. Neko's put herself in the plot, so there is no authoress!"

"Oh. O.K."

"So, anyway, Neko can fly up with a rope and hold onto it while we climb up! Then we kidnap Koenma, and then the Reikai Tantei will come. Then we can capture them too."

She thrust a long coil of rope at Neko, who attempted to catch it and failed. She bent over and grabbed it.

Neko's hair unbraided itself, and her bangs turned silver with gold streaks. She grew another tail. Transformation complete.

Sireah, Tikal, and Kagome watched her fly up and out of sight through the clouds.

Time Passes

Sireah's neck was stuck looking up. She had gotten frozen in this position from staring too long. Neko had been gone for an hour now. Where WAS she? Maybe the rope was taking too long to fall from it's height.

Tikky was sitting in the corner with a spiral notebook, scribbling something. Lucky Slorg had opened a 'Harry Potter' book and was flipping through the pages for clues to the next book. Kagome was really getting impatient, and she was mumbling to herself about idiots and dog demons.

Sireah, being that her head was stuck looking upright, was the first to notice a rope coil falling. "Oi, Kagome! Tikky! Lucky Slorg! Look!"

Sireah grabbed the rope and jerked. Bad mistake in planning.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'M GONNA DIE!"

A very unhappy kitty fell from the sky next to Sireah, the rope's end in her hand.

"Kagome I-"

"I know, I know…Neko didn't hold on hard enough."

"Sireah jerked too hard!"

"This is gonna cause problems…" Tikky sighed.

TBC

I might not add to this for a while.


	5. Cat the Kuramaismist

Tikky suddenly felt the smack of a broom on the back of her head.

"Ow! What gives?"

She turned around to see a wide-eyed girl with a pink fuzzy bunny on her shoulder.

"The bunny overlord does not want your presence here." She motioned to the bunny on her shoulder.

"Huh?" Tikky mumbled, rubbing the back of her head.

Neko' s nose was twitching. "You!" She pointed at the girl with the bunny. "You smell like a Kurama fan!"

"Kurama…" The girl twitched and pulled a tamborine out of nowhere, and began to beat 'Smile bomb' on her tamborine. "KURAMA!"

Neko and Sireah look at each other before glomping her, yelling "FELLOW KURAMAISMIST!"

Lucky Slorg, Tikky, and Kagome stared. They knew all to well where this was going.

Kagome silently wondered how in Inari's name someone could be that obsessive.

"Guys!" Sireah said happily,dragging the girl along behind her, "This is Cat! She's a fellow Kurama fan!"

Cat, Sireah and Neko formed a 3 person circle and began to chant. "KURAMA FOREVER!"

Lucky Slorg was about to burst out laughing. Tikky and Kagome were sweat dropping.

A few minutes later, Neko, Sireah, and their new-found friend Cat were done, and Cat was willing to come with them on their journey, insisting that the pink bunny overlord had told her to come along with them.

"But," Tikky interrupted, "We still don't know how we're gonna get up there!"

Kagome sighed. "We need a new plan."


	6. Ramachan

Heheh! Yes, I KNOW I have updated in a while! So shoot me! ((Shot gun noise is heard in background))

* * *

"So what exactly do you have in mind?" Neko inquired, while looking at Cat's Kurama action figure, turning it over and over in her hands jealously.

"I don't know!" Kagome sat down and hugged a Ren (Shaman King) plushie, muttering quietly about incompetence and the evils of the world.

By now, the original two Kuramaismists were hovering over Cat, or rather, her Kurama merchandise. Sireah was flipping through a bunch of Kurama pictures.

Lucky Slorg was looking on, slightly interested as Sireah and Neko were flipping through Cat's merchandise, when she noticed something Neko had dropped a few minutes before.

"Neko-"

"INARI!" Neko snatched it away before Lucky Slorg could pick it up. "KURAMA!"

"Is it Inari or Kurama?" Kagome asked.

"KURAMA!" Sireah squeaked.

"Can I see?!" Cat questioned.

"NO!" Neko hugged it, unwillingly allowing everyone a glimpse of what it was.

"It's a Kurama plushie?" Lucky Slorg smiled and moved closer to look at it.

"His name is Rama-chan," Neko said.

"You gave it a pet name?" Kagome inquired, staring.

"At least her boyfriend doesn't wear a belly shirt," Tikal muttered.

"Shuddup."

"Your boy friend wears a BELLY SHIRT."

"SHUT UP! At least mine doesn't jacket that makes his head look like a raisin!"(Horohoro from Shaman King)

Lucky Slorg laughed.

"SHUT UP!" Kagome yelled.

Everyone became silent. Neko gasped.

"What is it, Neko-chan?" Sireah asked.

Everyone's eyes shifted to the plushie.

The three Kuramaismists gasped.What they saw was too horrible for words.

To Be Continued


	7. Rain

"When did this happen?" Tikal asked, staring at the plushie.

"I don't know!" Neko yelped, eyes tearing up.

Neko sniffled and stared wide-eyed at her plushie.

"It's okay Neko," Kagome murmured, still holding her plush.

"NO IT'S NOT!" Cat, Neko, and Sireah yelled at once.

Kagome, Lucky Slorg and Tikal slowly backed away from the Kuramaismists.

Neko hugged her plushie and silently pulled her knees up to her chest.

"I can try to fix him for you, Neko…" Sireah started.

She couldn't entirely tell what Neko was saying,but it sounded a bit like 'work of the cheesegraters' and 'Karasu'.

Cat had gone silent.

"What is it?" Lucky Slorg asked.

"Do you…hear something?"Sireah inquired as she looked up.

"Hey, you're right." Neko looked up from her plushie.

Wondering where the noise was coming from, the girls all turned to the direction it sounded from- up.

"Is it…?" Tikal started,but she was interrupted by a drop of rain.

Soon, water was pounding down from the sky,Neko and her friends drenched. Running as fast as their legs would carry them, they had grabbed their things and left the area, en route for any place where they could stay dry.

Cat had spotted a cave a while back, so they headed off that direction ;however, they abruptly stopped when, in the pounding rain, Sireah had run into someone unseen.

Ignoring them, they continued on into the cave,which,for some reason,was glowing slightly,until they finally stopped inside the entrance.

"So, Neko what exactly was wrong with your plushie anyway?"

"He's missing a thorn on his rose whip!" Neko squeaked.

Everyone other than Neko,Cat,and Sireah sweatdropped.

"Hey," Kagome said, "was it me, or did that person Sireah ran into look a little like Botan?"

"Nah," Sireah said, "There's no way we could be in THAT cave….Right?"

To be continued...


End file.
